At times, "reality" comes crashing down. There are so many unknowns. So many. Like, Where will we live? How will we make a living? How will we make it back to Nicaragua? What about schooling for the kids?
It feels so...HEAVY. and I wonder, what happened to my faith?
I am a yo-yo...in one moment, filled with such faith and adventure that I feel like anything is possible, and what is there to fear? And then, it all looks so impossible to me, and I can't see my way through the murky waters, grasping at anything that looks like a foothold, desperate for air and wondering what are we doing?
In the middle of all these questions of house, jobs and food, I hear that small, urgent voice ask me...
And why do you worry about such things? Isn't life more than food and clothing?
But seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and all these things will be added unto you.
And so I cling to His promises, and wait.
3 comments:
I just stumbled over your blog, and your post hits right where I am. My husband was called away from his job 3 years ago, and into ministry...a ministry that has had no income of any kind. At this point, we have nothing to rely on except what God brings us next. As much as I trust God and know that this was HIS idea, and He has promised to provide, some days I get my eyes of him and onto money and wants.
I pray God provides you with more than you can imagine.
It seems like it should be easy, right? I mean, we're doing what God wants us to do...but every time I read the Bible and the account of somebody who stepped out in faith, I realize, it wasn't easy for them. So why should it be easy for us? I pray that God floods your hearts with peace and assurance that you are never out of His hands.
Colleen, I used you and Steve in the SS Class I was leading last week. We were talking about how to support people who step out in faith when that looks different than what society as a whole "expects." I hope that was OK, but it was such a good example to me of how a person(s) call can look so different from what we might expect, but still be very real and blessed.
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