What if?...(again)

I was thinking again, this morning, of what I want my life to look like and what steps I need to take to make these changes.   

Not to keep reposting old posts, but here is another post from my past that I remembered and wanted to share with you all.  I don't claim to have all the answers, but I do know that asking questions is a good place to start with change.

Click HERE to read the post in its entirety.

Below is the major portion of my blog:

A book that Abby lent us has definitely fueled our conversations. It is called Simple Spirituality. I highly recommend it to anyone who does not want to be “comfortable”; somebody who wants to be challenged in their spiritual walk and think more about how we as rich Christians should address our brothers and sister who live in poverty. 

A passage from Isaiah has also continually puzzled and challenged us. Here is the passage, from Isaiah 58:

2 Yet day after day they seek me and delight to know my ways, as if they were a nation that practiced righteousness and did not forsake the ordinance of their God; they ask of me righteous judgments, they delight to draw near to God. 

3 “Why do we fast, but you do not see? Why humble ourselves, but you do not notice? Look, you serve your own interest on your fast day, and oppress all your workers.

4 Look, you fast only to quarrel and to fight and to strike with a wicked fist. Such fasting as you do today will not make your voice heard on high.

5 Is this the fast that I choose, a day to humble oneself? Is it to bow down the head like a bulrush, and to lie in sackcloth and ashes? Will you call this a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord?

6 Is not this the fast that I choose:
To loose the bonds of injustice,
To undo the thongs of the yoke,
To let the oppressed go free,
And to break every yoke?

7 Is it not to share your bread with the hungry, 
and bring the homeless poor into your house; 
when you see the naked, to cover them , 
and not to hide yourself from your own kin?

What is God saying here? What does this look like in the 21st century? Is it possible that as Christians, God is asking us to do more than go to church once a week and give a tithe? We have been asking God to show us what this means. How do we “loose the bonds of injustice” or “break every yoke?” 

I started to imagine what this might look like. What if…

Instead of thinking that adoption is only for those who cannot have children, every Christian saw it as an alternative to abortion, a ministry, a way to personally affect someone for Jesus? Fact: If only 7% of the world’s Christians would adopt a child the orphanages of the world would be empty. Also see James 1:27

Instead of adorning our churches with fancy decorations, we gave the money to poorer churches for their needs, or even to homeless and starving families? James 2: 5,15,16,Romans 12:13

Instead of thoughtlessly piling our food on our plates and eating until we can hardly walk, we spent some time at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter…and learned what it means to be truly thankful? 1 Thessalonians 4: 18, Colossians 3:17

Instead of building a bubble around our family, we learned about persecuted Christians in other countries and taught our children to pray for them? Hebrews 13: 3

Instead of building big churches, we had only house churches, and the money we saved could be used to support our brothers and sisters in need? 1 Timothy 6:6-10

Instead of mothers competing against each other through their children, they became like true sisters, encouraging each other and praying for one another? Philippians 1:27, Ephesians 4:1-3, 1 John 4:20, I Peter 4:8, Titus 2:3-5, I Corinthians 10:24

Instead of tearing down masculinity and waffling on family issues, churches powerfully and practically supported the men and their marriages? 1 Peter 5: 1-3, James 5:16, Titus 2: 2, 6, Ephesians 5: 25-31

Instead of believing that war is the only option, we truly believed that Love overcomes all things? 1 John 4:4, 8 and 5: 3-5, 1 Corinthians 13:8,13, Romans 8:31,37

Instead of criticizing our leaders and fighting each other along political lines, we remember that our kingdom is not of this world and we pray for those in authority over us? 1 Peter 2:13, Romans 13:1,2

Instead of spending on our money on beautifying large houses in the suburbs, going on expensive vacations, making payments on luxurious vehicles and buying a new wardrobe every season, we lived more simply and directed the money towards people who don’t know where their next meal will come from? 1 Timothy 6:6-10, Colossians 3:2,3, James 2:14-17

Instead of thinking that evangelism is only the work of missionaries, we resolved to get to know our neighbors, our co-workers, and to walk alongside them and possibly even tell them about Jesus? I John 3: 18, James 4:12, 

What would this world look like? 

A repost about Love

After writing my last blog, I was thinking of what is truly important in this life, and was reminded of a post I had written several years ago in 2009, concerning love, and what it might look like.

Here is the excerpt:

I heard God tell me, “It doesn’t matter if you attend a million-member church, or wear designer clothes. If you don’t have love, then you have nothing.” 

It doesn’t matter if I am a supermom and can bake all kinds of goodies, home school seven children and keep a nice garden…if I don’t have love, than I have nothing. 

It doesn’t matter if I move half-way across the world to become a missionary and minister to the poor….if I don’t love, than I have nothing. 

It doesn’t matter if I am a pastor or an amazing speaker and people want to read my books or blogs…if I don’t have love, I have nothing. 

It doesn’t matter if I have a business, serve on several committees and have appointments every night of the week….if I don’t have love, than I have nothing. 

It doesn’t matter if I’m a worship leader or travel the nations and lead healing and deliverance teams…if I don’t have love, I have nothing. 

God was telling me that none of my efforts really matter if I don’t love or have love. Like the Bible says, if I know and understand all mysteries, but have not love, I have nothing. If I have prophetic powers and have faith so as to move mountains but have not love, I have nothing. 

So of course I asked God, Well, what is love? And I only had to continue reading a few verses down to see that 

Love is patient, 

love is kind

love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude

Love does not insist on its own way

love is not irritable or resentful

Love does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things

Love never fails

You can read the entire post HERE.

if I had died....

What would my funeral have looked like?

What would people have said of me?

Would anyone have come to mourn?

Would there be a hole in people's lives because of my death?

It's been almost a month since I've written, but I've written in my head almost every night.  So many questions and what if's.

One of the many questions I've asked myself is what kind of legacy would I have left behind, had I died?

Facing death, in any form, sharpens one's perspective.  The important parts of life become VERY important, and the rest, well, they aren't even in the picture.

So now I ask myself, what kind of life do I want to live, from here on out?  Is it worthwhile?  Am I storing up treasure in heaven, or caught up in too many details of life here on earth to even think about the hereafter?

How easily are we swept along with all of life's little cares and problems!  But as I lay there dying, before my 4th surgery, as I felt the blood filling up in my belly and the nurse continually telling the doctor they couldn't find a blood pressure, and there was hardly any blood in my arteries, I didn't think about how messy my house was.  or how much money we have in the bank.  or how many committees I was on, or not on.  or how my hair looked.

All I thought about were my husband and my sons.  I prayed for them, and asked God to help them with my death and bring them another woman to look after them.

That was it.  Nothing else filled my mind.

I'm not saying we shouldn't keep our houses in some sort of decent shape, or lay on the couch all day thinking about heaven. Not at all! Only that, are these the sort of things that we are completely focused on?  Do we let our minds be inundated with minor details without any thoughts about the really important things?  Like enjoying the moment.  Spending time and making memories with loved ones. Telling your loved ones how much you love them.

These......these are eternal.

When I die, I don't want to be remembered for my immaculate house or gourmet meals.

I want people to talk about my compassionate nature.  My listening ears.  Wise advice.  and how people felt truly loved by me, for who they were.

and what are those things compared to a constantly clean floor?

I feel like God has given me a second chance, and I pray every day for the right focus.  the right vision.  So I can have an eternal legacy.

like a ping-pong ball

I almost died. 

I'M ALIVE!

I almost died.

I'M ALIVE!

these few and tiny words keep bouncing around my head like little marbles.  they are heavy and my mind reaches for them, trying to grasp them, examine them, understand them.  but it fails.

My mind knows that something monumental and scary and intense recently happened, but the whole of it is too large to wrap around.  

My logical side tells me, I'm okay.  Other people tell me, you're okay now. Everything is fine. 

then why does it not feel fine?

why am I overwhelmed by emotions that I can hardly name, or pinpoint?

why do i bounce around from numb, to anger, to frustration, to fear, to sadness, to grief?

this territory seems strangely familiar.  

i've been here before. 

that's right.  many of these feelings, these emotions, raged through my mind after my daughter died.  

it doesn't make sense.  this had a happy ending.  my daughter's story did not have a happy ending (I'm sure there are those who say that her being in heaven is happy but to be perfectly honest, I would be happier if she was here with me)

all these thoughts, feeling and emotions make me want to go into hiding.  i don't want to be overwhelmed.  i want my normal, be a wife/mom life back where i just had to deal with keeping the house in some sort of order and making sure we all had clean clothes and food to eat.  

laundry, food, normal conversation...they seem so peripheral now.  

like i'm on one side of a canyon and they are on the other.  far away and completely out of reach

last night, i wondered...is this to be my lot in life?  to go from one trauma to the next?  just surviving, trying to make sense of things, trying to stop the onslaught of thoughts and emotions?  

i hear God whisper, you must be patient with yourself.  even when it is hard for others to understand where i am at, when it is hard for me to understand myself, i must wait...wait on Him.     

Planning is not my thing

I look back at my life over the past 10 years and think to myself....my life has not really gone the way I thought it would.  Many of my well-laid plans never happened and I walked through experiences I had never dreamed walk through.  I hadn't planned on losing my daughter.  I hadn't planned on losing another baby 4 months later.  I hadn't planned on getting a cervical fusion done last year.  And then...I hadn't planned on almost dying.

Let's go back 3 weeks ago today.  I was scheduled for a routine procedure, a hysterectomy, which would involve only an overnight stay.  I ended up having 4 surgeries in 24 hours, in ICU, and spending the next 8 days in the hospital.  Not quite what I had planned.

Below is my 8 days as told in quotes....from doctors, nurses, my hubby (S) and myself.

"Most women think afterwards, that's it?  After having a spinal fusion, this won't be any big deal" - pre-op nurses to me

"I don't feel well" - me to the nurses in my room, 3 hours post-op

"I'm not quite sure what's wrong.  I don't think you are bleeding internally, your heart rate is good, kidney output is good.  Perhaps you are having a reaction to the anesthesia. Should we wait to see what your hemoglobin is in an hour?"  - Dr. to me, 3.5 hrs post-op

"Colleen!! Colleen!!  Stay with me!! Code blue, code blue!!" - nurse yelling, 4 hours post-op

"We couldn't really find anything wrong in there" - Dr. to me, after the second surgery

"Is there a lot of fluid in there?" - Dr.
"Yes, there is a LOT of fluid in there" - ultrasound tech responds to dr.

"We're going to have to cut you wide open this time." - drs. to me, preparing for the third surgery

"We took 2.5 liters of blood out of your stomach cavity, but we still couldn't find the problem"

"We need to transport you downtown, to a bigger hospital, to help us find the problem"

"There's hardly any blood in here, just a trickle" - the anesthesiologist stated while trying three times to get an arterial line in my wrist

"I can't get any readings" - nurses trying to get my blood pressure multiple times while preparing for transport and during transport

"I can't breathe, it hurts so much, I feel like I'm dying" - me, the internal bleeding was crushing my organs, including my diaphragm, and I literally felt like I was suffocating.

"You're in ICU at LGH honey"

"We took another liter of blood out of your stomach cavity and recycled it into your body, you got 12 units of blood, both plasma and platelets"

"I just read your chart and HOLY CRAP!  How are you still here?"

"You must have a very strong body"

"She may have some post traumatic stress after this...it was very traumatic and life-threatening.  Keep an eye on her." - specialty surgeon to Steve

"After each surgery I could see you getting sicker and sicker, and I didn't think you were going to make it after the third surgery" - dr. to me

"It's a miracle you are still here"

What is some of the worst hours of my life?  Absolutely.

And yet, three weeks later, I ponder the miracle, and fragility, of life.

Today we begin Lent...

Has it truly been 6 weeks since I last posted?  My world has shrunk considerably these last few months...mostly due to my son's apraxia and sensory issues.  I hope to give an update this week, as well as explain my "small world" of late.

Lent was not a season that I grew up with..I don't remember hearing the word "lent" until I attended college, and it was a nebulous term.

As the years roll by, it is a word that has entered my consciousness gently, and I feel God inviting me to think seriously on this season.  For me, lent is a special season where I learn to refocus my life on Him, and purposefully incline my ear to hear His voice.  and pray that this becomes my habit year-round, not only for 40 days.

I want to share another blogger and her ideas for Lent...she has quite a list, and some of her ideas were quite unique.  You can click on the link HERE.  Enjoy!

Family pictures!

I wanted to share some family portraits we had taken right after Thanksgiving.

Such handsome men, are they not?   They are growing up so fast.

I've noticed that with each child we have added to our family, the sensation of time slipping away has deepened, and I have struggled in vain to hold the days back, to slow down time.

My baby will be 3 in a few short months (already!), thank you Lord for the gift of precious awareness, this living in the moment, the enjoyment of each breath my babies take, each discovery of new surprises.

I am truly blessed.

Am I different?

What does the church look like today?  There are endless debates on how much, and in what manner, we should look differently than the world.  Clothes, books, education, war, and hair are among the thousands of areas in which the members of the body of Christ do not agree.  

Just how different should we be?  

Last month our pastor talked of the kingdom of God, and what the early church "looked" like.  He read a letter, written not by a Christian, but by an outsider, one who observed Christians.  The letter was written to Diognites (written in Greek in the middle of the second century).  Notice his observations:

They are poor and yet they make many rich.

They are completely destitute and yet they enjoy complete abundance.

Christians cannot be distinguished from the rest of the human race by country or language or customs they do not live in cities of their own.  They do not use a peculiar form of speech they do not  follow an eccentric manner of life. Christians are residents.

And although they live in greek and barbarian cities alike as each ones lot has been cast they follow the customs of the country in clothing and food and other matters, so the eat and dress similar to other people

they live amidst other people

at the same time they give prove of the remarkable and their extraordinary commonwealth.

They live in their own countries but only as resident aliens.

They have a share in everything as citizen and yet they endure everything as foreigners.

Every foreign land is their fatherland and yet every fatherland is their foreign land.

Christians marry like everyone else and they beget children but they don’t discard their unwanted infants.

They share their food with each other but not their marriage bed.

The busy themselves on earth but their citizenship is in heaven.

They love all people but by all are persecuted.

They are unknown but still they are condemned.

They are put to death and yet they are brought to life (the were not afraid to die)

They are dishonored but in their very dishonor glorified.

They are defamed and they are vindicated.

They are reviled and yet they bless

They love their enemies.

When they are affronted they still pay due respect.

So Christians are similar to ordinary Romans and yet they are distinctive from ordinary Romans.

What the soul is in the body that Christians are in the world.

Our pastor then challenged us to contemplate:  What would an "outsider" say of us today?  

WHAT WOULD THE LETTER OF DIOGNITES SOUND LIKE IF HE WOULD WRITE IT ABOUT {insert you or your church}?

They drive cars but ....

They own houses yet....

They live in the most powerful nation of the earth but....

Some have money but...

They dress comfortably but...

They watch movies but...

They use technology....

Thoughts?

Bring on the new year!

This past year was a year of many changes for us: changes in jobs, living situations, schools...it felt like just about everything but family, thankfully.  We started the year with a very specific life plan and have ended the year looking deeply into the unknown.

My hubby and I just finished going through the devotional Moments with You, by Dennis and Barbara Rainey (excellent devotional book for couples, by the way!), and the last devotional of the year was thought provoking and quite suitable for our family.  You might say it is our family's theme this coming year.  The devotional talked of trusting God, in day and night, and quoted the first four lines of a poem, as seen below.

The lines are from the poem "The Gate of the Year", written in 1908 by Minnie Louise Haskins:

And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year: 

“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”

And he replied:

“Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God. 

That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”

So I went forth, and finding the Hand of God, trod gladly into the night. 

And He led me towards the hills and the breaking of day in the lone East.

So heart bestill:

What need our little life

Our human life to know,

If God hath comprehension?

In all the dizzy strife

Of things both high and low,

God hideth His intention.

God knows. His will

Is best. The stretch of years

Which wind ahead, so dim

To our imperfect vision,

Are clear to God. Our fears

Are premature; In Him,

All time hath full provision.

Then rest: until

God moves to lift the veil

From our impatient eyes,

When, as the sweeter features

Of Life’s stern face we hail,

Fair beyond all surmise

God’s thought around His creatures

Our mind shall fill.

Happy New Year!

Gifts that Give hope

Want to do something different this year for Christmas?

Check out Lancaster's Gifts that Give Hope Fair, happening November 20th.  Read the below for more information, or click on the link Gifts that Give Hope.

Lancaster’s 4^th annual Alternative Gift Fair is an opportunity to give back to the larger community and honor your loved ones at the same time. Instead of purchasing traditional gifts, participants honor their friends and family by making meaningful donations to local and global non-profits while improving the lives of others who are not on anyone’s gift list!

Participating in an alternative gift fair is a great way to make a difference this holiday season. At the fair, learn about the many local, national and international non-profit organizations making a difference in your community and world. Choose from a list of tangible gifts, such as a flock of chicks for a family in Haiti, food for an orphanage or life saving medicine and medical supplies. You will have an opportunity to choose donation items from thirty carefully selected participating non-profits. 

Not only will you be able to make a big difference, but you can enjoy a wonderful blend of food and beverages from Rachel’s Creperie, Café Chocolate, Upohar Ethnic Cuisine, Rafiki's Cafe, Cocina Mexicana, Rice and Noodles, Square One Coffee, Stroopies and Tortina Bakery.

Live items include jewelry from BEAD FOR LIFE, an organization that provides impoverished Ugandan women an opportunity to earn a living by making this beautiful jewelry out of colorful recycled paper. 100% of the proceeds from the sale go to BEAD FOR LIFE. 

Fair Trade Items include Divine Chocolate, Delicious Peace Coffee, Olive Oil from Palestine and a variety of Tea. Fair trade aims to use sustainable business to break cycles of poverty and dependency in the developing world. We all have a conscience, and we want to give people the chance to use it when they shop. 

How one word changed our lives

He never babbled as a baby.

I remember feeling a tug in my heart, wondering, fearing, that something was wrong.

As the months passed by and I waited, prayed, for a simple "ba, ba" or "da, da", utterings I heard other babies spout so easily, and people waved off my concerns when I had the courage to say them, I continued to wonder, deep down.

When he started speech therapy with Early Intervention, they said, yes, he has a delay, but he's bright, so it won't take long.

Again, the months slipped by, and a word would appear.   Elated, I breathed easier, thinking my fears were unfounded.

Until several days later, the word disappeared, and my hopes were dashed.

After eight months of therapy, the speech therapist mentioned in passing, I think he has speech apraxia.

I nodded dumbly and thought, Okay, he has a speech delay.  She didn't offer an explanation and I didn't ask.  I thought if it was important, she would say so.

Another month passed by, and she stated it again, more clearly, and with more emphasis this time.  This time, I looked it up.

Words like neurological condition, speech motor disorder, special needs, learning difficulties, and intensive speech therapy for years took my breath away.

Maybe she's wrong, I thought to myself.  I looked at the symptoms.  No or little babbling as an infant.  Saying a word and then "losing" it.  A large gap between receptive and expressive language.

Oh no.  I was right.  This is much more than a speech delay. Sometimes I hate it when I am right.

What is speech apraxia?  Basically, his brain has severe difficulty telling his mouth how to make intelligible sounds.  It is a medical condition, not a delay.  Kids with a speech delay would eventually learn to talk. Kids with apraxia will never learn to speak unless they have therapy.

Our 2 1/2 yr old son started intensive speech therapy this past week.  Thankfully, his speech therapist has 20 years of experience with apraxic kids.  This is key, because normal speech therapy measure will not work on our son.  And he will need years of therapy.  She tells me sympathetically that he has a long road ahead of him.  We all do.

What does this mean for our plans to return to Nicaragua?   We don't know.

We have been praying that God would heal our son, remove the necessity of having speech therapy a few times a week and save me the work of running around.

But He has yet to answer our prayer, at least in the way we are hoping.  and we have asked God to show us if we should plan to return to Nicaragua next summer, as we had been thinking.

So far, He has been silent on the issue.

Our family is our most important ministry.  We want our son to be able to communicate. He wants to communicate.  So we will stay until God answers our prayer, either through divine intervention or therapy.

Our future is unknown, but we can have peace, because we know Who holds our future.

Our "baby".   He is 2 1/2 yr old and currently has one word, "momma"

Prayer requests:
Pray that we could have strength to keep up with all the appointments.
Pray for wisdom as we learn how to discipline and work with our son, who understands much but is increasingly frustrated with his inability to talk.
Pray for patience and grace for all of us, as we work through all these issues.
Pray for sensitivity to God's spirit, as we seek to know the next steps.

a clothes forest

Living overseas in a third world country means we became accustomed to doing without many modern conveniences....one being the dryer. 

Something that seemed so necessary when we lived in the States before, is now....not quite so necessary.

This week our basement looks like the above, a forest of clothes, since we have no dryer and there is snow on the ground...feels like our home in Nicaragua :)

Praise you in the Storm by Casting Crowns

 because life doesn't always go as planned....but even so, I am continually reminded to praise God.

Than's 5 yr photos

I had some fun the other day (before the snow hit!) to take a few snapshots of my dear five year old boy.

my plan vs God's plan

I carefully laid every plan:

The future seemed so bright.

My hopes and dreams they towered high-

I saw no trace of night.

And then at closing of the day

I knelt in usual prayer,

And prayed; "Dear Lord, bless every plan-

All that I hope and dare."

But day by day my plans all failed,

My hopes came tumbling down.

All my ambitions disappeared,

And FAILURE was my crown.

Perplexed- I could not understand,

Had I not knelt in prayer?

And asked that every plan and hope

Would find a blessing rare?

Then in the stillness of the night,

Out from the shadows dim,

I heard a sweet persuading voice

That called me close to Him.

"Why don't you let Me make your plans?

I've trod the path before

Just leave the future in My hands,

I'll lead thee o'er and o'er."

In shame, I bowed my humble head;

My spirit low was brought,

For I had caught a strange new light,

By His own Spirit taught.

No longer do I pray as once,

"Dear Lord, bless all my plans."

But now I pray: "Lord, plan for me,

The future's in Thy hands."

Unknown

Happy 5th Birthday Nathaniel!

My boys are growing up WAY too fast...hard to believe my second son is 5 already!

We celebrated by having a few friends and cousins over to play.

Than picked out a dinosaur cake, which was the theme *smile*

Apparently the T-rex pinata wasn't behaving during the party.

Trains, cars and swords are what make my boy happy.

and of course, cake.

It's funny how Nicaraguan tradition is still deeply rooted in my little guy.  

We celebrated his birthday a day after his actual birthday, but when we told him happy birthday before the party, he replied, I haven't hit the pinata, so it isn't my birthday yet.  

Touche!

I am ME

I am me and you are YOU.


God created me to be....me.  He did not create me to be just like Mary, or Sue, or Jane. 


He does not expect me to be somebody I am not.


How often I have admired other women, for their creative energies, domestic diva prowess, baking abilities, wise character, and so forth.  I am blessed to know a host of beautiful women, both inside and out.  And how quickly that admiration has turned into self-condemnation, the voices asking me, taunting me, Why am I not like that?  


Why cannot I be more like them? 


Have more energy?


Be more organized?


Be more spontaneous?


Cook gourmet meals?


Speak more words of wisdom?


Laugh more?


Need less sleep?


Be more creative?


Be more time-efficient?


Be more extroverted?


Spend more time with God?


Not be stressed with only 3 children?


and on, and on, it goes.....there is no end to the introspection.  There never will be, if truth be told, because I am a truly flawed and imperfect person, whom God loves, and has loved, since the beginning of time.

"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

~ Romans 5:8

Meditate on that for a moment.

God loved me, before I started trying to be good, before I even knew that I was a sinner.  He loved me, loves me still, with ALL my faults.

If God can accept me as I am, loving me fully, can I not accept myself, and love myself for who He has made me?

I am NOT stating that we should never strive to be better, to become more like Him. Indeed, while He loves us as we are, He encourages us to be holy, as He is holy.  However, self-condemnation will never get us closer to Him. It only alienates us, from Him and from others.

There is a difference between striving to be more like God because we are in a relationship with Him and viewing others' gifts as an excuse to beat ourselves up.  God asks that we look to HIM, not others, as our example.  He needs to be our model.  

Remember, other people are not as flawless as you might think *wink, wink*

Scripture and a Snapshot

 “For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 

²⁶ Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? 

²⁷ And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? 

²⁸ And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, 

²⁹ yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. 

³⁰ But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you?You of little faith! 

Jesus - Matthew 6:25 - 30

There are many passages in the Bible that are daily applicable to my life, the above being one of them.  How often I read Jesus' words, nod my head and accept their quiet authority, and then not many days later, I realize that, once again, I have taken to worrying and carrying the heavy burdens of life.  How easily His truths slip through my fingers and steal away!  

God, grant that I may truly know you as my Provider of all things.