How one word changed our lives

He never babbled as a baby.

I remember feeling a tug in my heart, wondering, fearing, that something was wrong.

As the months passed by and I waited, prayed, for a simple "ba, ba" or "da, da", utterings I heard other babies spout so easily, and people waved off my concerns when I had the courage to say them, I continued to wonder, deep down.

When he started speech therapy with Early Intervention, they said, yes, he has a delay, but he's bright, so it won't take long.

Again, the months slipped by, and a word would appear.   Elated, I breathed easier, thinking my fears were unfounded.

Until several days later, the word disappeared, and my hopes were dashed.

After eight months of therapy, the speech therapist mentioned in passing, I think he has speech apraxia.

I nodded dumbly and thought, Okay, he has a speech delay.  She didn't offer an explanation and I didn't ask.  I thought if it was important, she would say so.

Another month passed by, and she stated it again, more clearly, and with more emphasis this time.  This time, I looked it up.

Words like neurological condition, speech motor disorder, special needs, learning difficulties, and intensive speech therapy for years took my breath away.

Maybe she's wrong, I thought to myself.  I looked at the symptoms.  No or little babbling as an infant.  Saying a word and then "losing" it.  A large gap between receptive and expressive language.

Oh no.  I was right.  This is much more than a speech delay. Sometimes I hate it when I am right.

What is speech apraxia?  Basically, his brain has severe difficulty telling his mouth how to make intelligible sounds.  It is a medical condition, not a delay.  Kids with a speech delay would eventually learn to talk. Kids with apraxia will never learn to speak unless they have therapy.

Our 2 1/2 yr old son started intensive speech therapy this past week.  Thankfully, his speech therapist has 20 years of experience with apraxic kids.  This is key, because normal speech therapy measure will not work on our son.  And he will need years of therapy.  She tells me sympathetically that he has a long road ahead of him.  We all do.

What does this mean for our plans to return to Nicaragua?   We don't know.

We have been praying that God would heal our son, remove the necessity of having speech therapy a few times a week and save me the work of running around.

But He has yet to answer our prayer, at least in the way we are hoping.  and we have asked God to show us if we should plan to return to Nicaragua next summer, as we had been thinking.

So far, He has been silent on the issue.

Our family is our most important ministry.  We want our son to be able to communicate. He wants to communicate.  So we will stay until God answers our prayer, either through divine intervention or therapy.

Our future is unknown, but we can have peace, because we know Who holds our future.

Our "baby".   He is 2 1/2 yr old and currently has one word, "momma"

Prayer requests:
Pray that we could have strength to keep up with all the appointments.
Pray for wisdom as we learn how to discipline and work with our son, who understands much but is increasingly frustrated with his inability to talk.
Pray for patience and grace for all of us, as we work through all these issues.
Pray for sensitivity to God's spirit, as we seek to know the next steps.